The Prick in my head
My world is small. It is. I think I need new people, but I don't want any, not really and that's the problem.
Or is it really? A problem, I mean. If I make it 'not' a problem, it'll go away since it's not a global scale crisis such as famine or poverty. I'm complicating something that is simple, heck, effortless to some. I should just reach out shouldn't I? To Socialize. That accursed act of mingling with people, on purpose. But that's kinda difficult when you don't really want to.
See? I'm walking in circles. It all goes back to me being an anti-social freak. I reassure myself. 'It's okay' says the stunted 'he' that is the voice in my head. No, I'm not mental. Please, everybody talks to themselves. And yes, my conscience is a dude who is an extremely disagreeable,stubborn, confused, greedy and lazy prick. Oh, the only positive attribute he has is that, sometimes he materialize in the spitting image of Keanu Reeves. ...Okay, maybe, like the rest of you people out there, I AM semi-mental. Jeez.
My brother says it's okay too. He said I shouldn't have to make myself want to 'mingle', that I should just be nice to people, especially my parents. And I love him for that :)
Still, when you live in a small world, the inhabitants of your kingdom have their own lives. They're my universe when I'm not theirs. It gets cold and lonely at times.
Me and my contradictions. Which I know is normal. Which I know everybody has. There he goes again. That disagreeable prick in my head. He's telling me to "shut up and grow up", when he has not change a bit since we were 13.
The Prick: You should get that Assassin's Creed game. I need it.
...just shut up, prick.
2 comments:
ur prick sounds a lot like my Subconscious, except that Keanu Reeves part, since Subconscious is a girl XD
and yeah, ur bro's right. it's never wrong to be an antisocial freak. be nice to people, but if people treat u like shit, well, do the same to them (ignore my obsession on justice and fairness please)
sometimes when i try to mingle with people, things get extremely awkward, or extremely annoying (u see, a lot of ppl i try to make friends with on fb treated me in a very hostile way. dunno why). so at some point i just quit. being lonely is bad, but being in the aforementioned situations are a lot worse. well, that's in my freekin opinion anyway :)
I'm done. Haha. :) With all this shit, I mean. As long as prick's with me, we're good.
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