AWOL

Um, yeah. I've been AWOL for two days now. Dear classmates, I'm sorry.

I couldn't stop wishing that I'd just disappear...vanish into thin air...or just fade away or something. It's difficult. You feel as if a rug has been pulled from beneath your feet and you're just falling off the face of the Earth. And you keep seeing these faceless people in your dreams just turning and looking at you (though they have no eyes) as you walk with your head down. A lot of crazy thoughts went through my mind. Scared myself witless.

Speaking of which, those damned 'running' nightmares are back. Hadn't had one for a week. Had one just now. It's sort of funny though, this one. I was a dude in it, Will's brother to be exact. Will from the movie Good Will Hunting. We were in this house together, he locked me in a room that had lotsa windows. Egh, what am I doing? Point is, he chased me, wanted to kill me. All the villains in my 'running' nightmares want a piece of my hide. Always. Disturbed, aren't I? Yeah.

Anyway, I'm back to square one. I've not an inkling what I'm going to do after college. I'm weighing my options but...I don't know. Do I even have any? It's confusing. You feel like you're either at a dead-end (what a fitting term...) or on a path that forks into God knows how many paths. Either way, I'm lost.

Sightless and senseless,

I wander in my ocean of nothingness.